How The Binge Stole Fit-mass

Every Sh*t 
Down in Sh*tville
Liked fitness a lot... But the Binge,
Who lived just North of Sh*t-ville,
Did NOT! The Binge hated fitness! Hated it worse than Gigli.
He just wanted folks to relax and eat pigily. 
It could be that he just never learned to eat right,
Or that he sat on the couch and watched TV all night.
But I think that the most likely reason of all,
May have been that his pants